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Showing posts with label Week 3. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Week 3. Show all posts

Friday, October 1, 2010

Wk 04 - "Edward Does Have Cool Hair"

(BCEGDDS2C2UD)

Maybe this school isn't so bad after all. The girls have really taken notice to me over the past week. Thanks to my new move, my reputation is really starting to build.




I rented Twilight again so I could really get a feel for Edward's speech. I'm still pissed about the movie's slanderous portrayal of Vampires, but I will agree to stop pursuing my class-action lawsuit if I can get a girlfriend from it.

Belle is HOT, but she has the personality of a slug. Watching her for a couple of hours makes me want to kill myself all over again. Sure, she's a total BABE, but what a buzz kill! She's another phony I'd like to put in my shoes for a day.

One thing about Edward is he does have cool hair. I mean - it's alright. I've been experimenting with my hair - trying to change my look up a little. If it resembles Edward's, don't think I'm trying to copy him. That would just be weird!

This past week I've perfected talking like him. It's not very hard, since he hardly ever says anything. I guess it's supposed to add to his mystique. When he does talk, it's all slow and he makes it seem like he's in physical pain. Like the words he is saying are stabbing him or something. What a Tool-Bag!

But I still decided to give it a shot anyway with the stare, the look, and the new hair style. I caught Veronica alone in the hall one day and tested it out on her.



It went wicked awesome! She was speechless! She practically melted with emotion. Who knew acting like a Tool could be so great. Tomorrow I'll go in for the kill (not literally) and ask her out.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Wk 03 - Twilight = $$$

I'm going to be a millionaire!! After watching that freekin' movie Twilight, I'm seeing dollar signs because once I get ahold of a good lawyer, I'm going to start a class action lawsuit for defamation of the Vampire character. If you're a Vampire, get in contact with me.

For the record - I'm gonna set something straight right now. Vampires DO NOT sparkle. Not in the sun, not in the shade, not inside, and not outside. What the *#@!, Stephenie! Why don't you just dress us all up in tu-tus and have us sing the theme song to Strawberry Shortcake (nevermind how I know about that). No wonder I can't get any respect.

Come to think of it, now I understand why the kids in gym class started calling me Sparky.

I plan to get this Vampire image thing back on track this year. Restore vampire respect to its rightful state!

I did manage to take some notes, though. That dude, Edward, is a total wuss-bag and annoying dork, but he does manage to get the chicks. He has that whole tortured, complicated teenage angst thing down pat. The girls pour all over him. So I stayed up all night practicing, and I think I perfected the look pretty good. The next day, I took it for a test spin with two totally hot girls in the hallway.


Edward just might be on to something. Those babes really seemed to be digging it. In fact, it got such good results I'm working on how to talk like him now.