SEE - I KNEW IT!
Lady Gaga showed up in an egg at the Grammy's. I mean - ummm - that's what I've been told ... I couldn't watch because I was busy doing something more manly, like watching a Monster Truck Rally.
Did you see the egg she showed up in? It looked just like an egg from the movie Alien. Just Saying.
You can go ahead and pretend like it's nothing to worry about, but I'm gonna keep an eye out on that one. If you saw the movie, then you'd know their trick is to get you all comfortable around them, and then plant an alien in your stomach when your not looking.
As a matter of fact, my stomach started hurting on Monday night, and I was convinced that one of those little gut-busting freaks was trying to pop out of me, so I made Garth take me to the emergency room. It ended up being just some gas from bad Deer blood that I drank the night before, but I didn't want to take any chances.
Then, the hospital wouldn't let us leave because they said Obama's new health care plan didn't cover Vampires. That's when Garth tried to do his Jedi trick on them (you know - his make believe Vampire mind control thing), so I took that opportunity and slipped out of the hospital while no was watching me. I haven't seen Garth back yet - hopefully he got away. Oh well.
This Bite Club thing is getting a little out of hand. There's like 100 members now and they're starting to get really rowdy - talking about a Vampire revolution and all. I need to find a way to chill them out.
My fight with Brad Pitt is scheduled for next week which is kind of tweaking me out. His girl, Himerionitori (whatever), keeps trying to talk to me and it's only making him more mental. I hear he's been watching Troy over and over to get pumped.
One good thing did come out of Bite Club this week, though - if you want to call it that. Some of the members "convinced" our school principal to let me and Growley back in school. I'm not sure what they said to him, but something tells me I don't want to know!
At least now I'll get my chance to smooth things over with Veronica.
Read my blog from the beginning, you big phony!